I confess, i am really into hardcore BDSM. The harsher it is for the girl the better. I really want to do it in real life. And not just some whips and candles and semi light taps. I'm talking things like big needles and skewers, hard wire for a whip, a soldering iron, vice grips, serious electro play, strangling, ect. As close to real genuine sexual themed torture as i can get without wanting to know where she hides her money lol. I really want to hurt the girl in my fantasies and inflict as much pain as possible. Here's where it really gets fucked up though. I am married but i don't even want to do stuff like that to my wife. I can't do that stuff to someone i care about even if she would let me (she wouldn't). It would have to be someone I have no feelings for whatsoever and pre arranged with their consent. But, even if i could find someone like that my wife would consider that cheating. Even if i could resist fucking the woman at my mercy (which at least for me would defeat the purpose of it all) it would still be cheating and even I see it that way. Frustrating bit of fuckery this, isn't it? I love my wife, I don't want to hurt her or leave her. I've always just had this really sadistic side. I guess i'll just keep jerking off to the sickest BDSM i can find.
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Im thinking of going to a sex addition clinic because I am dreaming up more extreme ideas day by day bored at home looking for work.
Last night I spent 2 hours edge play which felt great with precum oozing out over the whole period, dribbling down my engorge cock shaft but I still didn't get off... Thing is....
1) I pushed two needles through my cock head and out the underside
2) I connected each needle to the wire of a tens unit
3) Over the space of an hour I worked my way through every programme up to max power several times!
4) When I pulled the needle out after the session, I was excite by the blood spurting out of the holes like a fountain...so much so that I collect some, drank it and smeared it over my cock, balls and face.
5) When I had finished clearing up, I had the craving to do it all over again...
Next time I want 3 needles pushed through making a star shape. I'm going to push them trough just at the ridge of my bell end so that they hold on a ring fitted around my shaft under the sensitive ridge. I'll connect one wire to the ring and the other to a metal butt plug that I will stuff up my butt...this configuration always works well for electro-stim but with the added stimulation of the electricity flowing through the crossed over needles passing directly through my cock head...it should be truly mind blowing and very, very intense.
I'd welcome your thoughts!?
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