My Chinese experience.

I moved to China from the USA 7 months ago for a job. This place is great if you are a want to get laid. I was never really into asian chicks until I moved here. Sure I whacked it to a few asian prons in my lifetime but it was never my thing.

It is so fucking easy to get laid in China. If you cannot get laid in the USA but have the money to take a trip I recommend coming to China. These Chinese girls are so down to fuck Americans its crazy.

First of all they are all relatively hot. The majority of chicks that are here are skinny. Very rarely do you see overweight women. I'm sure these numbers are growing because you do see McDonalds, Burger King, Pizza Hut, Etc. but at the moment most chicks are reasonably skinny. Even the fat chicks are pretty skinny compared to US chicks.

They all dress slutty. I live in southern China but have traveled around a bit since moving here. All the girls wear tiny ass shorts or skirts, high heels, and possibly tights or stockings. Pretty fucking hot. If you are a leg man then China is heaven for you. Even the older women here look damn hot.

These chicks have no hair on their bodies. Legs and arms are fucking smoooooth. You may find a little bit of hair under their arms and their snatches can be a bit of a jungle but the rest of their bodies are smooth sailing. No stubble, they just do not grow hair on most of their body. The hair on their head is pretty sexy though. They normally have long flowing black hair. A lot of them dye their hair red or blonde so these chicks stand out a bit but their hair is pretty damn hot.

You have a slight western influence on their fashion. I have not seen so much spandex or hipster glasses in my life. These chicks make it look hot though. If you are into gaps then China is the place to go. Gaps occur on skinny chicks where there is space between their thighs. Never really noticed this before but here in China there are so many chicks with gaps that you have to notice. Pretty hot. All you can think about is the easy access you have to their snizatch.

These chicks like western dudes. I've seen some ugly expats here with pretty hot chicks. It helps, of course, if you have a bit of money.

prostitution is pretty much legal

here is how it works

its illegal but nobody gives a shit

there are a few levels of prostitution here

there are the street girls

cost about 150rmb which is about 20 bucks are so. you just pull up to a whore store and the mommy (female pimp) brings out a line up of girls. you pick your girl and take her back to your place or you can rent a decent hotel room for around 8 bucks for a few hours. chicks are pretty hot. they will go with you and shower with you. then either fuck or suck until you are done. then take their payment and then leave. sometimes if you give them 150 rmb the girl will give you a few dollars change. The great thing about these street girls is that they will normally give you their phone number so you can call them directly without having to go through the mommy. you wont pay any less but they will show up to your door and you don't have to go through the hassle of going the the whore store (sometimes its closed)

you can also go to KTV. KTV is a karaoke spot. some of them are bit different but a lot of them are the same. You pay for the private room and some booze. pay for the Dj and then they bring in a line up of 10-20 or more chicks depending on where you go. these chicks are pretty damn hot. you give them maybe 200-300 RMB for them to be your companion during the evening. once you pick a chick they will either keep their formal clothes on or change into street clothes. they will sit with you all night, talk to you, pour your drinks, sing with you, light your smokes, and let you semi grope them. if they are into you you can get a bit more action for free. Ive seed guys get blowjobs or handjobs or kisses from KTV chicks that are attacted to them. Ive also seen chicks that are just jobbers that do not do anything to exciting most of the night. You can take some of these broads home. Normally will cost you a few hundred more RMB. Not all of them are whores so you may be SOL if you pick the wrong one. The ones that do go home are pretty fun.

You can also go to the chinese massage. you can get a foot massage here for 50rmb or less than 10 bucks. chicks massage your whole body then spend a long time on your feet. Nothing crazy sexual but they normally wear pretty short skirts and flirt with you a bit.

These same massage parlors offer full body massages. costs about 100rmb or around 16 bucks. they will take your shirt off and make you lay down. massage your whole body including your ass and legs. then when they are done they will flip you over and jerk you off. chicks are hot. wear short skirts and sort of hump you all night while they massage you. hand jobs are pretty good. they will slip a finger in your ass if you are into that and sometimes you can get a couple chicks if you want to pay. the massage includes a hot shower so it is a pretty good way to relax.

you have saunas that you can go to. pretty much the best shit ive had since ive been here. combines all the previous shit into one slam bamma. you walk into a lobby and they bring in a line up of chicks. you pick the one you want. they are all dressed hot. and she takes you to a private room. then she changes in front of you to something sexy and she has you take a shower. she will shower with you if you want and she will scrub you down. she is normally naked and she will play with your dick a little bit. then she puts you on a massage table and gives you a naked massage. she will mount you and give you a shitty massage. bitch is a whore not a fucking licensed masseuse but it feels good enough. when you are done with the massage she will take you into the bedroom and then the fun starts. they normally put on some japanese porn on the tv that is pretty hot and then you get down to business. pretty much anything goes. most chicks wont let you fuck them in the ass but they will blow you from any position and let you fuck them for as long as it takes.sometimes they have toys. pretty much always you have to wear a condom. they will play with you until you are done then you can take another shower or bath. whole thing is like 600rmb which is around 100 bucks. pretty dope time.

girls are hot. all look pretty young. i have had a few older women which was kinda weird getting a hj from a chick that could be my aunt but w/e

there are higher level hos that are available as well, just havent experienced them for myself. there are also places that deliver chicks to your hotel room. they send a line up and you pick the one you want. sometimes 1000-1500 rmb.

my favorite is the sauna. pretty reasonable for the time you get. the street hos are pretty fun but it is hit or miss. sometimes you get girl that blows but does not fuck and then sometimes vice versa. you do luck out sometimes and get a hottie that blows and fucks but you gotta grab these bitches numbers because they normally get scooped up pretty quick.

sometimes after chinese new year your favorite girl will go back to their hometown and never come back. i dont think that whoreing is looked down on as much in China. it seems as if a lot of regular girls may try it out to make a bit of money for a little while. a lot of them get burned out and then go get regular jobs or regular girlfriends but they can give you a pretty damn good ride while they are testing the waters.

TL/DR come to china if you want to empty your balls

I'll confess. I am a 26 year old autistic virgin who has no chance in getting laid. I will probably remain single the rest of my life. There have been times where I came close to having sex, but due to the hurr durr of autism I always fucked it up. This happened with multiple women to the point where I know I'm beyond cure without medication. I essentially stopped dating and spend everyday on my broke unemployed ass wondering what there is to life.

I'm too proud to fuck hookers, let alone have them look at me strangely. I guess that's not part of the cost, huh? Not surprised. Besides, I wouldn't want to be in their shoes.

Oh, the medication. I haven't had health insurance for a long time due to its affordability (or lack thereof), but since I'm unemployed from my last job now, I finally managed to get some and will hopefully be doped up soon. For a long time I never believed in meds, but now? Fuck it. All my friends have left and now I spend my time reading about space aliens and kinky sex stories. I'll do whatever the fuck I want to do.

In b4 insults

Son of a bitch. I knew I lived in my own little slice of backwards agricultural America, but fuck me runnin' man.

I'm strolling down the sidewalk near my local bad park in the shitty neighborhood, or so it says on my school zoning pamphlet, and i'm trying to score a dub sack. Nothing special, just a couple grams in the evening to keep the rational thoughts away until my usual cannabis service provider finishes his shift at KFC. I see a dude who i can see is smoking, exactly what i'm not sure of. I stroll by, non threatening. When i get up close i see he's deeply engaged in chasing an oxy tab around a scquare of reynold's wrap. when he stops for a conniption between hits i ask if he knows where i can get a bag. This fool just looks me dead in the eye and says, "what do i look like, A fucking pot head?"

He tells me to fuck off and leave him alone. Apparently the last guy fucked off, but stuck around.

so let's recap. dude in a pinch asks the dope fiend if he knows where one can procure his own set of drugs, Dope fiend is disgusted with stoner in his choice of narcotic. Apparently only cave men smoke weed when we have a vast variety of prescription drugs available. This story doesn't have a point, i just wonder if anyone else out there sees what i'm getting at here.

oh well, i got my blunt. fuck it.

here's to you ya oxymoron. wherever you are tonight. fucking dick.

PRETTY




Pretty house, pretty flowers, and all the pretty people. That could be the start and end to the story there. However, what story wants to just be pretty? You can have your pretty dress and pretty white stallion, but in the end, the stallion just drops dead.
So, imagine this scene. You have two people, let’s say Steve and Martha. They've been together since high school and raised two pretty girls who are almost through high school themselves. Steve has his perfect dream job as a novelist. Plus, he has his fucking millionth copy sold party next week at The Garches. Martha stays at home, the biggest fucking prettiest house in the Upper Valley. She probably just lays around and suntans all day, trying to be that much...prettier for her husband. Not that it would matter much, they've already been to Hawaii twice this year, and it's only March!
Oh wait, sorry, getting a bit off topic there.
So, back to the story.
The couple Steve and Martha then go to Steve's millionth copy sold party, which they just decided to call their "Zeroooooo" Party. Of course they did. Here's where the story gets a little more interesting. So, their eldest daughter, a pretty little thing, just turned 18, let’s just call her Belle to simplify things. Well, she has this boyfriend, jock, quarterback, straight “A” student. A nice guy really. However, unknown to Steve and Martha, she decides to date this other dude. Well, dude not exactly anymore. Sex change, though, would have just been a little prettier. Let's say he is a "duder". As in, all grapes add the "r" when they become raisins. The duder is about 65 now, which only gives him a couple more years before he can retire from the exotic books business. The party is also going to be the platform for Steve to announce his new book. The duder goes up to the stage, and pulls back the curtains to the new jacket cover. Let's just skip all the pretty words, and the fight, don't forget the arson and the restraining order. However, let's not forget Steve and Martha's new jobs at Feed Freddies, the move to Downton Street, and the divorce. Also, Belle's perfect quarterback boyfriend broke up with her when she started wearing more clothes than Queen Elizabeth to school. At very least, the strip club is getting even busier with the Belle, sorry royal ass Eliza, running the show.
Pretty ending to that story, eh? Well, that's just the beginning. This is all just hypothetical, of course. Let's not forget that.
Now, imagine this strip club in the Lower Valley. It’s already been established that pretty young Eliza would be the up on stage shaking her two big moneymakers. You got to love the girls with daddy issues! Let’s say that her tips are pretty good, but it is never enough. Eliza then starts taking the men back stage for her fucking specialty. OK, probably shouldn’t go there.
There is this one fucking ugly duder that would always come in with the prettiest flowers, lilies to be exact. He had a fetish of making Eliza into his pretty yellow picture. Sure, things are going pretty and well for Belle, sorry Eliza, but why does the story have to end there.
So, her estranged father, Steve comes in during one night in carnival. Oh, that place is decked out in all kinds of pretty, from the pretty beads down to the pretty masks. Steve has a right old time, drinks some beers, has a couple nice views. He goes home later and neither of them are any the wiser.
Then, it is a week into Lent that something really happened. The duder is busy working with his Eliza canvas when in walked Belle’s former quarterback dude and his buddies. OK, true, they aren't 21 yet, but who cares when they come in with some perfectly pretty fake I.D.’s. Imagine it going down like this. The dude tries to cop some feels from his former girlfriend when she is covered in all the lilies. Naturally, Eliza tries to cover herself and run. Here’s the best part. The duder fucker grabs her ankle and trips her. He then pulls out a gun and tells her to don’t fucking move again. Before he can start arranging his flowers again, the dude grabs the duder. The dude then gets shot in the head, and so does pretty little fucking Eliza when she goes to help out. The old fucker runs and gets away.
Don’t you just love where these are going? At very least, it would sound better for the story if Belle/Eliza and the quarterback didn’t die.
OK, maybe it is time for a little change of pace, maybe something a little prettier. It probably would be a good idea to give this second duder a name, to make things a little easier to remember. His name will be Ralph, after this guy...Oh never mind. So, Ralph escapes from the Lower Valley. Let it just be said that he does get away with murder. OK, so, Ralph then goes to Amsterdam in the Netherlands. Flowers, flowers everywhere, but so are the pretty people. He especially loves frequenting the Red Light District. That old fucker does what he wants. So, the moral of the story is that Ralph finds a little money on the streets, goes and buys some dope, does it up with a cop outside, and gets arrested.
Justice served, well no.
Actually, there is an explosion the next day in the lobby of the jail. All those mother fuckers die but Ralph. He escapes and no harm done. Then, he goes out and buys a lottery ticket and make some good dough. Next, he invests some of that, and due to a great surge in the economy, he brings in all the big bills. Afterwards, he starts a modeling agency, where he can look to his hearts desire, each of which become a canvas of his own. His business goes under in a couple years, but would cares; Ralph got to live his dream. That is so much prettier than all those people.
That's it, done; let's end the story right there. There were rich people who found out their daughter was fucking some duder. Don't forget the naked cover. It doesn't matter too much, those people got what they desired anyway. Then, the next scene had that pretty girl from the first tale who works at a strip club. She doesn't even realize when her own shithead father comes into the place and takes a couple peaks. Her promiscuity at least was the end of her anyway, when this God awful duder shows up. Shoots her and her ex boyfriend. The story ends on a high notes when the duder travels to Amsterdam, and makes lots of money doing what he loves.
That could be the end of it; it just could. However, why do stories always have to end just when the going gets good? There are always those hardworking people out there that want to make more money. Those are good people and their work have to be honored.
More, more, more, that is all anybody wants now a days. Let's give the people want they want.
OK, imagine this girl...since this is a sequel, it would make sense to bring back at least some of the characters from the first part. So, this girl is Steve and Martha's other daughter...Trudy. She may not be the prettiest girl, but everyone says she's beautiful on the inside with doves flying out of her ass at least twice a day. Trudy is two grades younger than that ex-stripper sister of her's Eliza, Belle, whatever her name is. It doesn't matter anymore. The dove girl sings to all the other birds and dances on the moon. Well, at least before that was before her slut sister was rightly shot in the head. Then, Trudy becomes very introverted, thinking more about her pretty self than to that cruel, ugly world out there. She ends up dropping out of school as soon as she turns 16, and emancipates herself from her now deadbeat parents. Don't worry, she has a perfectly good job next to Feed Freddies at a place called Happy Harvey's; it's a pub. No, she doesn't serve the drinks. Instead, Trudy works at the daycare in the back watching over all the pretty children.
Not long after she started working there, she began to wear this pretty sequenced red dress everyday. That was the only dress she could afford anyway. She did it for this regular that would come in, taller, youngish. He made Trudy feel beautiful again. This dude was not a pervert; he would never touch her. Well, that was until she turned 18, and then they humped it out like hippos.
One day, she over hears him saying he lost his job, so she offers for him to stay with her. He was too much of a mutch not to take it. They lived, they humped, oh life was good. Things soon got more serious, and prudy Trudy was finally falling in love. Ah, isn't that sweet. Let's fast forward now to the part of the story where she finds out he is already married. The mutch only thought she was his friend. Trudy beats the shit out of his pretty head for that. It's pretty, no, beautiful seeing the sight of the bastard afterwards. He must have lost at least 100 pounds with all the stuffing knocked out of him. Now, his wife cop from down in the Lower Valley may have not fucked or, for that matter, seen the fucker for awhile, but she is definitely the daughter of a bitch. Saying she got even is good, but retribution sounds much better. Oh, that poor girl's beauty was just pouring out of her, glistening like a rainbow.
Let's make one this perfectly clear, Trudy does not die EVER! For, that girl's hind is as tough as her hippo brethren. Oh course, that girl did have to go to some physical therapy afterwards. With her new training she can consider herself equal, and close brethren to the asses.
So, imagine a pretty physical therapy center on the edge of suburban bliss. It is a place where stallions run as free as well, stallions. OK, the fence probably keeps them a little more contained than that. Anyway, the center uses the stallions as part of the therapy. Trudy loves the new freedom and the fucking feeling of wind running through her hair. There was just one snitch in her new found happiness, the stallion, Woody, collapses onto it's side while she is riding him. Trudy's other leg is crushed and then amputated. Oh well, lesson learned.
She returns to the therapy center a while later, overjoyed to find Woody is being helped right beside her. He is slowly becoming lame. It doesn't take long for Trudy to start to hate the pretty white stallion. She is becoming Woody's bitch, lower than an animal, as it turns out. Nobody could stay mad at those bit brown eyes for long and soon she no longer minded her pretty third class status. Even more pretty was the sight of her in her red dress, which now made her look like a fruity flamingo.
Enough, enough, story time.
So, uh, losing her leg doesn't stop her from riding Woody all she wanted, slowly of could, he was just too big, and one more blow would spell the end for each of them. The riding slowly got faster and faster as they grow more used to each other. Soon, it was love, big old stallion love. To put it a big more blunt, Woody is soon getting plenty of fill from his sweet little flamingo. So much so, he fell down again during their faster riding sessions. He cracked a couple of his pretty ribs, fractured his big old pretty skull. At very least Trudy continued living, but perhaps not too happily ever after.
Oh come on, the beginning did say exactly how the story was going to end. Get a pretty fucking grip!