The penis -- if you think about it -- is the most enterprising engineering feat imaginable -- a cantilevered structure, hydraulics, propulsion, pistons, compression, inflation, heat sensitive -- practically every engineering characteristic -- towers, draw-bridges, rocket-ships -- no man-made engineering structure to match it. HAHAHAAHAHAH

Philosophy of Sex

"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy."
�Tom Clancy

"You know "that look" women get when they want sex? Me neither."
�Steve Martin

"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don�t have a good partner, you�d better have a good hand."
�Woody Allen

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
�Rodney Dangerfield

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."
�Lynn Lavner

"Leaving sex to the feminists is like letting your dog vacation at the taxidermist."
�Matt Barry

"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
�Camille Paglia

"Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant."
�George Burns

"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships."
�Sharon Stone

"My girlfriend always laughs during sex�-no matter what she�s reading."
�Steve Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers)

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
�Jack Nicholson

"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."
�Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady � and you didn�t think Barbara had a sense of humor)

"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man�s genitals through his wallet."
�Robin Williams

"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself."
�Roseanne

"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."
�Billy Crystal

"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful."
�Robert De Niro

"There�s a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what�s the problem?"
�Dustin Hoffman

"There�s very little advice in men�s magazines, because men think, I know what I�m doing. Just show me somebody naked."
�Jerry Seinfeld

"Instead of getting married again, I�m going to find a woman I don�t like and just give her a house."
�Rod Stewart

I'm getting married in less than a month with the girl I met over 10 years ago.

A couple of months ago we got a new girl at work. Looks rather fine, bit crazy, has a boyfriend for the last couple of years. She is 18, i am 28. We could get along. Nothing more.

A couple of weeks ago, i brought her home after work, because she was afraid to go through a tunnel. Ok. Nothing happened.
Two days later i brought her home again. After discussing breastsizes, she claimed to have an F cup. I said i didn't believe her and she told me to feel it. First from the outside of her shirt, but then she lifted her boobs out and told me to really feel it. And so i did. Nothing more, nothing less. She DID have an F cup.

After that there was a lot of innuendo between us. But nothing more.

Last week we had a party with some colleagues. Had dinner with like 20 people and went for a drink afterwards. We were both kinda wasted and i went with her afterwards. Lots of colleagues were still there drinking when we left but noone mentioned us leaving together.

When we were on our way home, she came very close next to me and grabbed my butt. I grabbed hers. I put my hand down the back of her pants and squeezed her ass. Then we both started touching eachother. When we came past a playground we stopped. She told me she wanted me in her.

We went to a fence at the back of the playground, where we weren't visible to traffic on the suburban roads. Only people who could see us were people living in the houses around the playground. But they were probably sleeping ;)

I took of her belt and put my hand in her pants. She was allready soaked. I started rubbing her clit. She rubbed my dick from outside my pants.
With one hand I took off the bra she was wearing underneath her shirt. I lifted her shirt and started sucking her hard nipples. Damn those were fine. She dropped her pants, so I had more room to manouevre. And so I did. I slid my middlefinger a little bit down, stuck it in her pussy and started pumping it in and out. Juice was coming out as if the Hooverdam had been opened. I took my finger over the bridge between her pussy and her anus. Oh how she was wet. I pushed onto her anus and my finger just slid right in. Just a little bit though.
She didn't even moan about it. She turned around and bent over. She told me to fuck her.

I took my cock out, raging hard. She stepped out of her pants, which were allready lying on the ground, and spread her legs while holding the fence. I put two fingers in her pussy first, but she was so wet that I didn't need to moist her even more. I slid my cock in. She was kinda tight but it felt so good. At that moment I thought about a condom. Hell no. Fuck that shit. Keep thrusting. It was damn fine. I held and squeezed her boobs from behind while I rammed my cock in that pussy. I pushed my thumb up her butthole again.

She asked me if I ever did anal before. Nope I hadn't. I did fantasize about it though. She told me that she never tried it either, but she was willing to. And so I did. I put my German helmet against her asshole and slowly started putting more pressure onto it. The head went in. She moaned a bit. I took it out and tried it again. The head and some shaft went in. She didn't moan (probably because of all the people living in the houses around us.). I took out my penis again and after that it was all smooth entrance. Just like fucking a very tight pussy. Best fuck of all times.

After a couple of minutes I came inside her. Immediately she turned around and took my penis in her hand and started jacking me off. She knew what I wanted. I kept rubbing her pussy and sucking on her tits. We kissed. She was good. After a couple of minutes she started shaking. She came! Hell yeah, she came. She even squirted a bit. I was so aroused that I wanted to stick my dick inside her once again.

She said: "Let's go to the swing over there." The swing was in the middle of the playground, where every passing car could see us. Not that there had been any cars since the beginning of our little adventure but still. In full sight, and full nudity, she walked backwards to the swing. It was a swing where you can lay yourself in. Sort of a hammock. She laid herself on her back and invited me in. And so we fucked again. It was sensual, adventurous and pornographic at the same time.
After a while I came again. It took somewhat longer this time. Probably because I had shot my load before. But this time i shot my load on her belly and between her tits. She took it off with her finger and ate it. My arousal didn't go away. I still had raging hard cock but I knew I couldn't finish a third time. I'm getting old you know.

When we were on top of eachother in the swing she asked me why she was completely naked and I only had my pants down on my ankles. I told her it was because her beauty didn't give me time to take my clothes off. And we kissed again.

Some time later I brought her home. She invited me into her living room, but I declined. I knew her boyfriend was in the room on the second floor and her mother probably too. It was too dangerous. I went home and slept next to my fiance.

This was my fourth, but definately best cheat. I'm a dick.

I confess my sister in law is a moron. literally a moron. She has kids, They're morons. Her husband is a moron. morons. I feel my kids getting more stupid when they come over. I wanna put them all in a trashbag and chuck them over a bridge. Bastard moronic offspring.

i confes i like to stand on high bridges on rainy days and when schoolgirls walkn ast below I piss on them, so they will not notice i am peeing.

I am 37. This is my favourtie hobby.

Bend me over the bridge?

Video I saw probably several years ago and haven't been able to find since. Two girls, youngish teasing and stuff on webcam I think at least one of them is in like a black shirt and black spandex shorts the other one is in something similar, the video is long I think like 55 min (might be different haven't seen it in like 2-3 years) though they don't show much by the end they have lost a decent amount of the clothes (if not all of em) and are doing like gymnastic stuff specifically a bridge where you lean backwards and bend your legs and arch your back and hold yourself up with your hands like the opposite of a pushup position. Pretty sure they're wearing spandex stuff and pretty sure it's black. Any help?

Looking for a series of videos that I've seen on here and xvideos. They're of two lesbian teens (hispanic) who are dating(?). One of them is just of them making out and talking about how much they love eachother under a bridge or something. The other two i've seen are of them in a room eating eachother out (one video for each girl). Tried looking all over but just can't find them, any help would be appreciated.

Only ever popped off premature once. Never had a wet dream, which I kinda regret. Never came in my pants.

I had a friend who did though, while we were watching an old Swedish Erotica clip at a bachelor party back in the day. Back then you still needed a screen and a projector. Pat had never had a real girlfriend, had never gotten a handful, not sure he’d even kissed a girl. The movie was on and we were all shouting at it like we knew what we were talking about. Sticks in my mind that it was an old Seka loop (this was the early 80s) and she was about to get it in the ass. Just as the heavily-mustachioed ‘hero’, parted the posterior of his equally hairy companion, you heard Pat say, “Oh no. Oh no. Oh no! Fuck!” and off he rushed. We teased him unmercifully, although we were no doubt hard as stone as well.

It started out as an easy day. Kansas in the summer. Hot in the morning. Hottest in the afternoon. Hot all night. I finished mowing the lawn and was walking down the to gas station for a ‘pop’. There were girls and young women laying out on a couple of lawns taking advantage of the morning sun. To a youngster like me, it was like viewing heaven and I was hard all the way to the pop machine and back. But you’d better believe I took the same route home.

The swimming pool opened at 1 and I spent the day at the pool. More swimsuits and sun-tanned flesh. Bikinis. One pieces. Lifeguards. Our regular lifeguard was a beauty named Julie and she had this light pink bikini that I could describe to you still. It was almost transparent enough for you to believe that it was. To this day though, I’m sure I could describe her patch to you, so maybe it was more transparent than I remember. Fuck. Hard off and on all afternoon and all the way home on my bicycle.

Home in time for dinner. No time to jerk off. Talk about a build-up. Looking back at it now, if I knew then what I know now, I would have assumed that if I came at that moment, I’d be completely dehydrated.

That evening I had to work at the concession stand at the local ball diamond. Softball double-header. There were usually of couple younger people, like me, and a couple of older people. That evening one of the teachers from the local elementary school was on. Mrs. Barker. We used to sit up in my buddy’s old treehouse and watch her sunbathe on her deck, which she thought was invisible to the rest of the world, so she sunbathed naked. She didn’t know about the treehouse. Man. Every time I brushed against her that evening, and it wasn’t always an accident, I was hard. Being as old as I am now, I wish it was still that easy.

I was so amped-up and so miserably horny that I rushed out before we were done cleaning up. Fumbled some excuse about not feeling well and bolted.

There was this little bathhouse just past the outfield, but the man was locking it up so I ran over the bridge over the creek and started through the trees to head up the hill to this little shelter, an old, stone, WPA-built picnic shelter thats table was long since gone. I knew that all it would take was a few strokes and I’d be fine.

My cock was banging up against my belly and I could feel each step in my balls as I ran. I was picturing Julie without her bikini and Mrs. Barker without her shorts and t-shirt. I was picturing those young women on the lawn asking me to join them. I was picturing all kinds of things as I rounded the corner into that picnic shelter and dropped my shorts.

And there, like a live-action porno movie, three feet from me, was a guy I knew from the local mechanic shop where my folks had always taken their car to be serviced.

I can still picture it. Like me, his shorts were down. Kneeling in front of him was Tina, someone I knew a little but we didn’t run with the same crowd so I didn’t know her well. She was a mousey, quiet type, lean and angular, with a bookworm’s reputation and who had never gone to school dances when we were in the same school.

She was wearing cut off denim shorts, flip flops, and a softball jersey. The jersey was unbuttoned and pulled back and I could see the curve of her breasts. I could also see Junior’s calloused, mechanic’s fingers were tangled in her hair and it was obvious that his cock was in her mouth to the root. Her hands were wrapped around his waist and were clutching at his ass.

He looked up and grunted, “What the fuck? Hey! Val! Hey!”

The one of her eyes that I could see met mine and she went down a little further on what must have been a very hard cock. I didn’t actually see her grin but I’ve always felt like she did.

And then, like my friend Pat, I stuttered, “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!”

I can’t begin to tell you how much I came. I didn’t touch myself and no one touched me. But I came all the same. Long, ropey streams of which I can still picture. I hit her softball jersey, her hair, his hand, her face, his leg, and the tops of her thighs.

“WHAT THE FUCK!”

Bobbing down quick, I grabbed the waistbands of my shorts and underpants and yanking them up over my still dripping, still hard cock, I muttered, “Oh hey! Hey, Junior. Tina. Sorry!” And I ran.

That night at home, in bed, with the lights out, I came again. And again the next day. That night I made a call.

“Hello?”

“Hi. Is Tina there?”

“Yeah, Tiiiiiiiiina! Get your ass over here! Phone’s for you!”

“Hello?”

“Hey, Tina, it’s Val, I was wondering . . . “

“No. I’m not busy tonight. Whatcha got in mind?”

“Ummmmm, maybe we could . . . “

“Sure. Pick me up at 8?”

“I . . . “

She’d already hung up.

I rolled my old Ford up to her house a few minutes early and she was already on the porch. Dressed exactly the same as last night. Might even have been the same softball jersey.

“Hey, Val!”

“Hey.

“Junior’s pretty pissed at you. You know why, right?”

“Because I came on his hand?”

“Because you came on his hand. And his shorts. And his leg. And then you ran off.”

“What were you doing with Junior, anyway?”

“He has a nice dick.”

“He’s twice your age.”

“He has a nice dick.”

“I didn’t know you were into that.”

“Into what? Sex? Older guys? Dick? I like dick and it likes me.”

“I guess I just didn’t know.”

“I keep my head down and my mouth shut. That’s how bad reputations get started.”

I laughed. “You do NOT keep your mouth shut!”

“And you’ll know exactly how much I don’t, as long as you keep yours shut. Deal?”

“Deal.”

I get so fucking tired about hearing about queer rights. That fucking trial about the faggots room mate recording him and then he jumped of the bridge. The trial is lame fuck all the gay support groups.