Hello

I am a married white female in my early 30's. I have blond hair and am what most men would consider to be good looking. My husband and I have been married for 6 years. I recently discovered he has been looking at Interracial Pornography on the internet. Almost exclusively black men having sex with white women. There seems to be an underlying theme of White Wives cheating on their husbands with well endowed black men, sometimes with the white husbands being forced to watch.

This was a very disturbing discovery for me. I was appalled and surprised that my husband has so much of this stuff on his computer and in his internet history. What's even worse is he looks at "cuckold" porn and many of the women in these videos have the same look that I do. Thin, white women with with blond hair and blue eyes. If you do not know what interracial cuckold is, it's pornography where a white man watches his wife wife have sex with a black man. The black man always has a much larger penis and the white man is verbally and physically humiliated by his wife and the black man. Why does my husband look at this stuff? Is it possible that he is thinking of me while he watches it? Why would he fantasize and masturbate to thoughts of me with black men?

As I found this pornography on my husbands computer, I began looking at it more and more. My husband doesn't know that I know about his fetish. It began is detective work to find out what turns him on and what he spends his time looking at.

I was raised in a racist family in the south and was taught to stay away from black men. I have never been with a black man. And now here is the even bigger problem.

It's beginning to turn ME on as well. When I was looking at my husbands computer there was one picture of a blond girl that looks a lot like I do, with a very large black man. I was shocked and excited at the size of his penis. I hate to admit it because it makes me feel so ashamed, but I masturbated that night while viewing the picture. I didn't want to, but I was so turned on that I felt like I couldn't stop myself. I felt dirty afterward but it was just the beginning of my addiction.

Now I've began viewing these interracial picture of black men with with women on my own computer. These fantasies are dominating my sex life, and I've lost interest in having sex with my husband. Just the sight of a black mans penis seems to get me going and I can't stop thinking about it. One re-occurring fantasy I have been having is being "taken" by a group of 5 large black men. When I go out in public and see a black man walking by, I think about him sexually even if my husband is by my side.

This is an intrusive fantasy that has been affecting my marriage and sex life. I would like to know what I can do to stop it, and get my husband to stop looking at it as well.

When I was 19 years old and in college in Florida, I got really heavy into drugs. Mainly party drugs like coke and ecstasy, and of course plenty of weed, but on occasion other drugs as well. I was out of control and living one big party life on my parent's dime while they struggled mightily to pay for me to have the opportunity they never had and go to college. Looking back I feel like a total asshole about it now as they wanted nothing more than for me to be successful and not have to struggle...sorry, I digressed.

Anyway, since I had no money and wanted to keep up my partying lifestyle and since I was always very athletic, in shape and considered "good-looking", through one of the people I met in the party scene I ended up doing some modeling to make some extra money. Pretty low rent stuff, nothing glamorous, but a couple hundred bucks a week.

This quickly evolved into the opportunity to do some "videos". It started with just masturbation videos of me lying in bed, or on a couch or in the shower jerking off. I figured I was going to do it anyway so why not get paid for it and I was getting paid $100-200 per day that I did a shoot. I could sometimes do 3 or 4 scenes in a day. The guy running the operation said he was impressed by my "re-load" ability and also that I had just the right cock for it...I'm about 8 inches, decently thick and my dick looks perfectly formed from shaft to head and can blow pretty big loads even after only a little break in between. I knew that these were primarily for gay guys to watch but I didn't care. If someone gets off from seeing me, so fucking what. I did these for a while and then he asked one day if I'd want to do some full sex movies and photo shoots and showed me some of his portfolio and all things considered the chicks looked pretty hot and we were now talking more like $300-500 per day so I jumped right at the chance.

It was a crazy scene and pretty much everything you wanted was at your fingertips. Women and drugs galore. Parties every night after shooting. We were all in the 18-22 age bracket so it was just a no responsibility show. But as quickly as I made money it went back out the door on drugs and partying. Then one night when we were partying at the main house this director used for shooting videos, him and a couple of the other "big wigs" in their operation asked me if I would be willing to do some more hardcore shit. At first I was thinking they meant bondage, s&m type stuff, but they quickly made it clear they were talking gay action. I immediately said not a chance, I was straight and no way I could do it. They pushed the matter (and a coffee table with a big pile of blow on it) and said that all the actors in their gay shoots are straight guys because that is the look they wanted in their videos, strong masculine men, not femboys. The guys just do "gay for pay" and they also said I could make up to a $1000 per shoot depending on the circumstances. At that point my eyes lit up and I think they knew they had me. I asked them more questions and they said I could be strictly a top and receive blow jobs, that I didn't have to get fucked or suck or kiss anyone if I didn't want to. I could also do bi scenes where a female actress or two would be involved. I said, what the fuck, let's give it a try.

The next week they had scheduled me in for my first scene. I was shaking like a leaf prior to which was totally not like me. In the other stuff I had already done I was totally calm and had no issues getting naked, getting hard and fucking in front of other people. It was a one on one scene with me and another guy. I was going to be swimming naked in the pool and then get out and immediately go to the lounge chair next to the pool when the "pool guy" was going to show up to service the pool and eventually me who was masturbating while watching him clean the pool. I actually was having a difficult time getting hard which was totally not the norm for me, but he came over and began blowing me for a while and soon enough I did get fully hard. I had sunglasses on and just kept my eyes closed and picturing hot women. I put on a condom and ended up fucking him in a few different positions and then to my surprise he end up blowing his load on my chest as he was riding me, then slid off my cock, dropped back down and sucked me to completion taking my load all over his face.

I said afterward that it wasn't that bad, but I didn't think I wanted to do it again...until I got my next offer and more cash. It went on like this for a while and me just doing the fucking and getting sucked. I still was primarily doing straight shoots though. Then the director came to me with a proposal for a scene. It would be me and this girl I had done some straight scenes with and we would be a "married" couple and then another guy who was coming to our house to do some repairs. But he wanted it to be a scene where me and her completely serviced this guy. We all were going to suck and fuck each other, no holds barred type stuff. I was extremely hesitant but he offered up my biggest payday yet and it was a good chunk of money for 4-5 hours of total "work". I was so far gone into the scene at that time that I agreed and said let's do this.

The day came and again I was nervous. I did all my usual prep on my "manscaping" and where I normally do everything I can to keep myself fresh down below, this time I added the step of the diet one of the other male actors recommended and his full enema routine to completely clean me out. The worst thing on a porn set when anal is involved is having a shit accident. It came time for the scene and we were in the bedroom on a king size bed where I was fucking the girl for a while then the "repair" man came in, he joined in with me "thinking" he was just going to play jointly with my wife but then he starts licking my balls and ass and pulling out my cock from the wife's pussy and sucking on it. We go through some more motions and she is sucking him then she tells me she wants to see me suck him and this is it, the moment I took a cock in my mouth. I did what I had to do and then after he fucks her it was my turn to take his cock. I was laying on my back as she sat on my face and then he started fucking my ass. Hurt like hell but I had to put up a good front. He even made a comment that got into the video about how tight my ass was. Anyway, we finished the scene after everyone had been fucked and sucked and I went out that night with some of the other people from set and we got destroyed on drugs and booze. I was fucked up beyond belief and when I got home that night I said that was it, I was done. Absolutely no more of all of it. The drugs the porn, nothing. The next day I called up the director and said to pull me from the stuff he had me scheduled for the next week. He tried to convince me and told me what a fucking amazing job I had done the day before, but I told him I had to get out. I couldn't handle the life and really was regretting all of it. I pulled the plug that day and never looked back.

So, somehow through all of this I didn't flunk out of school. I ended up completing my degree and living out a pretty mundane, boring college life and working a bullshit part-time job in one of the offices on campus answering phones and shit. Really nobody in my "normal" life had any clue about what I had done. My parents were none the wiser about anything I did partying or whatever and were proud as could be the day they saw me get my degree. I started a job with a top consulting firm and in the decade plus since, have worked hard and progressed so much in my career that I look at the "crazy" money I was making from porn and laugh at how little it is compared to now. I am engaged to a very attractive and smart girl who is an attorney and makes plenty of money herself, but also has no clue about my prior life.

I guess my biggest fear is that one day I am going to come on here and see one of my videos front and center. I know they are out there in various places on the web, but they obviously weren't under my real name and the look I had back then was very different than it is now where I am clean cut hair, have a beard, and even back then in a bunch of the scenes I had bleached blonde hair for a while and a deep Floridian tan. I guess my real name and SSN is on file with the porn company somewhere so that could somehow get out, but generally speaking I got away free and clear without any repercussions. Crazy the journey our lives take.

Looking for someone to masturbate on Cam with! Open to Skype or other forms of Webcam! Looking for a female, but I might consider males! If interested, reply or PM me! ;)

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Hello ladies 👋🏿I'm a clean straight single dominant handsome Black Man,53 years young Pisces ♓ from Massachusetts USA.

I'm looking for that very open-minded shy but adventurous inexperienced but curious rebel female/wife (28-40) who has fantasize and masturbated to the idea 💡 of being sodomized by a black man on video to embarrass, humilated and degrade your racist husband boyfriend and family and friends.

I'm looking for a local unowned obedient super submissive rebellious wife/female who wants to lick, 😋 suck, worship and deepthroat her first black dick 🍆.

I'm looking to chat with rebel females in (CT, VT NH ME&MA) who are curious about this post in real life 

I confess that I get off to anything that shocks me. Motherless helps with ita little but it's almost like an addiction, I need it and everything else seems too ordinary and plain.

In real life I'm fairly normal... except when the sudden urge to do something spontaneous and shocking takes over, and suddenly I'm seeing a prostitute, cumming in my female friend's shampoo in the washroom, finding videos of my parents fucking in their private collection and masturbating to it, or even getting sucked off at an adult bookstore while watching gay porn. None of it really appeals to me but the shock value that I'm doing it is intense. I once paid for humiliating dominatrix phone/cam sex because half the time my brain was getting off to the thought of "I can't believe I'm doing this" and "what the fuck am I doing?". I'm starting to think that I can't control this compulsion although another part of me doesn't want to.

I'm guessing I'm not the only one on Motherless who gets off to shocking things though. But I'm thinking I have a pretty bad case.

I confess I should have been bolder with my current wife when she was trying to get me to leave my ex-wife. A was willing to do anything and everything then; I should have done more. Now that we're together, life has gotten in the way and we don't do all the exciting things we used to do. Here are some of them, memorialized for posterity.

We went to strip clubs and she sucked my cock as I sat there, before and after I got dances from strippers. I exposed her tits to show my friends. She went upstairs to talk to the manager about possibly working there. She gave a lap dance to another patron with her tits out. She couldn't take her dress off entirely because she wasn't wearing any underwear.

She sucked my cock everywhere. In elevators, in restaurants as we sat at the table, at crowded bars as we stood there drinking (one bouncer told me to put it away), on stage at a packed Valentine's Day party.

I tried to piss a little in her mouth every time my cock was in it, to the point she asked her girlfriends what that liquid might be. Eventually she figured it out. I still do this.

I pissed into her throat. I was angry and drunk so unfortunately I don't recall this with the utmost clarity, but I put my cock all the way into her mouth and made her drink it all.

I left multiple marks on her face and cleavage with a knife.

She sent me nudes and I took many.

I fucked her ass several times with no lube. After I came, she cleaned my cock with her mouth.

I woke up in the middle of the night and shoved my cock into her mouth and fucked it until I came. For no reason other than that I could.

Before she left for her office job in the morning, I made her get on her knees and lick my balls while I jerked off and then came into her mouth.

I put my big toe in her pussy.

When I was sick, I blew my nose into her mouth many times instead of into a tissue.

I discarded my used up tasteless chewing gum into her mouth.

I spit in her mouth as I fucked her (I still do this).

I sat on her face many times, her tongue deep in my ass, as I slapped her pussy and squeezed her tits and masturbated before coming in her mouth (I still do this).

I forced a long blue dildo deep into her throat and made her puke.

I made her starve herself to lose weight.

I went down on her only once (now it's never).

I sat on the sofa and watched a movie on the television while she was on her knees with my cock in her mouth the entire time.

At a restaurant in the winter, my feet were cold so I took off my shoes and put my feet into her mouth to warm them.

I put my toes into her mouth often.

I never used a condom. I made her take the morning after pill several times.

I licked her eye.

We had phone sex frequently. Most of it involved me making her slap her pussy - hard - or gagging herself with a dildo or inserting a large butt plug.

I made her touch herself, rub her pussy juice on her neck like perfume, and go to her favorite bar and hug and greet the female bartender.

I confess, I wish I did more.

I deleted a few items from this repost because "The content has been reported by members for possibly breaking the site Terms of Use. It is currently under review by site admins."

Looking for a female masturbation partner in Toronto.

I'm 30, white, slim and good looking and want to find a woman under 40 who would be interested in getting off with me (preferably at her place) during the day. The kinkier the porn you like the better. Not even looking for sex, just a partner in crime (we can explore some other things if we get along).

I am looking for a female to schedule my masturbation. From how often and when, to what I watch, how I do it, edging, ruining and even small amounts of sisification. will provide pics and videos if requested.

I recently informed my (female) griend of ML and the confessions section. I hoped she would find my previous posts and masturbate to my dick. I know she is a total slut in bed and I'd like to fuck her brains out.... Last time we were together i rubbed her pussy over pants a bit but she rejected me cause I'm in a relationship.